LETTER TO MY BIGGEST CRITIC

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Dear Critic,

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Today is a beautiful day. The air feels warm and the breeze is light. No Monday blues. I hope you are having a good one too. Oh wait, am guessing your beautiful days are the days you win, and they have been quite a number. Congratulations are in order. I respect your trade and the will, that zeal you have. That’s quite some tenacity you got there. Funny, even as I write to you, you try to dictate how this letter should be phrased??? Dude, you got some nerve but I remember my mother always telling M.E to be a go-getter. You certainly heard that, didn’t you? You must have been taking notes while I was bored with all the stuff I thought I already knew. But you have been such an inspiration am starting to learn the lessons that I thought I knew from you. Thank you.

My! We could almost pass for best friends. I mean remember the nights we stayed up talking? the stories we wrote together? the places we’ve been? mostly in dark corners of my mental space. We’ve been there together, you know my darkest secrets and you never tell. We’ve been in the mirror together every day, we’ve compared and come out unworthy. Together. Wow! My fondest memories though are those in my journal. Boy, you are crazy! I mean all those stories that I never got to complete because you took my attention, remember? The poems I abandoned as soon as I began because you’ve got your history right bro, nobody can be as good as Maya. Oh how you know your facts so well.

You have also saved M.E a lot. Oh yes, you are always reminding M.E to be Little Miss Perfect. I hear you baby, I hear you. Telling M.E who to talk to and who not to because well, don’t you value my reputation? So kind of you:) I mean who am I to take such reckless chances? Such uncalculated risks? Good thing, you know your Math. Oh plus all those people I stopped talking to because they just might share what only you and I know, good job. Who knows they could have stabbed M.E in the back but you, you always got my back. I never doubted that. I mean all the times you tipped M.E on what they might think and keeping M.E in the dark on who ‘they’ are. Anyway you must have been saving my a**

No, it’s not your birthday so no reason to get all mushy here but it’s a very important step in our relationship am taking, so I thought I’d recount all the good times we’ve had. Baby it’s not you, it’s M.E (no, am not being melodramatic with the movie lines). I know it’s been bitter-sweet, who knows how many more adventures we’d have missed together slowly killing my dreams and shelving M.E to be only but an insignificant wall flower? You are very insightful and I guess with such reminiscing you might have guessed that we are done, but if you didn’t well now you know. I wrote this for you; frame it, hang it on your wall and when you are tempted to seek M.E out do yourself a favor and read it. No, not the letter. This little poem:

Dear Critic in M.E,
Leave my poems to take their course,
Let my stories find their ending.
Keep your pointers on the dangers that lurk behind opportunities,
Cancel the history lessons am no longer interested.
Save your facts for a less open minded being,
I hear you say my poem doesn’t rhyme, take your convention too
and with it the care of what they might think.
No, I’m not keeping the memories.

Don’t forget to frame it, okay?

Love (courteously though, like a normal letter should end right? You deserve that much at least),
M.E

“I am my own biggest critic. Before anyone else has criticized me, I have already criticized  myself. But for the rest of my life, I am going to be with me and I don’t want to spend my life with someone who is always so critical. So I am going to stop being my own critic. It’s high time that I accept all the great things about me.” -C. Joy Bell C.

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