It’s almost 1am. 2 minutes to, to be exact. It’s been a long day and I should be sleeping but a righteous indignation keeps M.E up. I’ve had a lot of questions running through my seared mind. Like;
Do you ever think that your dreams are too outlandish, that maybe one day you’ll realize that and they’ll be forgotten like your teenage reveries?
Do you ever think that people expect too much of you and you feel you’re probably too ordinary? Like who gave them the idea I just might be Superman?
Do you ever think that you’re probably not as good as you think you are? That out there are people who write so profoundly and for you to think yourself a writer is probably an insult to them?
“We cannot all be great painters and poets, but let your life be a painting worth hanging, a poem worth writing.” -Poems Porn
Do you ever think that your life just might end and nobody will ever remember that you lived? That you’ll leave this world just as you found it and your 18, 30 or 70 years will be inconsequential to the history of humanity?
Do you ever think that you might end up just like your mother or your father? Not that it’s a despicable thing but that you’d probably have wanted to be a little bit better?
Do you ever think that maybe your hometown will actually remain underdeveloped? That the people there will probably never have a good laugh at something Bazanye wrote because they just might never see newspapers?
Do you ever think that the only change of government we’ll ever know will be in blogs and discussions on the late night news channels? That your children will be born into the same Uganda you are in and they’ll hear the same complaints you heard?
Do you ever think that nothing will probably change? Yet you feel like this is not what you signed up for when you were born into this world? Like there has to be something more, like this is not all there is to life, like there must be something that you can surely do…? Like there is so much greatness on the inside of you and somehow you are being forced to settle for less than you are? Like you cannot afford to walk away empty handed, like you have to give the world a piece of you…surely, it must be something they can use?
Do you ever think that all feminism will ever be is a movement that yields nothing? Like all the women that will ever be applauded are those that oversee road constructions and city renovations? Do you ever think that your only real claim to importance will be the name by your Mrs.?
Do you ever think that writing will probably only be a career for James Patterson and John Grisham? Like all those creative people will ever manage to make a living off are in jobs they complain about in their journals?
Do you ever think that one day you’ll look your boy in the eye and tell him to be a doctor or an engineer like your mummy did? Like one day you’ll accept, you’ll let everything die and conform?
Do you ever think that someday you might wake up and have nothing to live for but your next paycheck? Like life will lose meaning someday and you’ll only go through the motions with no passion, no dreams, no goals?
No, pessimism is not something I do so well but these questions challenge M.E. Surely, there must be someone out there they challenge too…someone who wants to do better, someone who wants so much to leave the world a better place, someone who wants so much to leave a mark….
“I have had dreams, and I have had nightmares. I overcame the nightmare because of my dreams.” -Jonas Salik